True Love Waits

It is official. Deployment has started. I wanted to post one final pre-deployment blog before deployment started and well, time got away from me.

The day of deployment, I took my husband to the pier, kissed him and said see you soon. He grabbed his bags and made way to the ship. I then met a friend at the NEX and we headed to the pier for the hour and a half of family time that was given aboard the ship.

My friend and I went our separate ways with our SOs. My husband had to work. He had to muster at 0600 and because some idiots were late muster didn't start until 0630. Muster lasted more than 30 minutes leaving less than 30 minutes with him. He walks up and says he had bad news. He had to go do some sort of training and had to go immediately. Giving us about 5 minutes to say our real "See you later". I anticipated that he wouldn't get much time with me.. So, I wasn't upset when we had to part early.

I met up with my friends to wait for the time to be kicked off the ship. Some friends shared some tears and I tried to be there to comfort them as best as I could. Goodbyes are never truly easy when you love someone when they are leaving for such a long period of time.

I was ok.
I was ready for this deployment. Ready to start the journey and conquer it.

I hadn't shed a tear. I didn't think I would have. I'm not one to cry much- it's a rare thing. That doesn't mean that leaving my husband was any easier on me, just means I deal with my emotions in a much different way and in some ways, Maybe I had prepared myself a bit more mentally. At this point, I was sure I wasn't going to cry.

Of course, sometimes, in being so sure of being prepared, you then realize that just maybe there is no real way to prepare for a deployment 100%. My husband snuck me a text. The last text I would get from my husband for several months. Simply said how much he loves me and that he misses me already.  If you know my husband, you know he's not the "Wear his heart on his sleeve" kind of guy. Two tears fell down my cheeks. All because of an unexpected last text message.

I had said my goodbye, I had mentually prepared myself- told myself, "Ok, that was that.. on to the next thing.". The text was unexpected. But my goodness, it was such an amazing feeling reading it.

Watching the ship, I wasn't sad, I wasn't upset in any way. I was Proud. I have never felt so proud in my life.

The distance from my husband, deployments.. surviving on emails. This is the life I chose. The life I chose when I said, "yes" to his marriage proposal. This is the sacrifice I make. The sacrifice I make so that my husband can do his job, to serve his country and provide for our little family.

His job is to serve his country, My job is to support him on the homefront. To wait for him. To stay true to him. To above all.. Love him.

True love waits, and I'll wait as longs as it takes.

Thank You for being a Friend..

As I'm writing this, I have the theme song from Golden girls running through my head. I said I would write about things I have learned through this year of underways and the number one thing that sticks out in my head is the Friendships.. a.k.a. "Support".

Seriously, when my husband and I were talking about this post before writing it.. I belted out singing, "Thank you for being a friend. Traveled down the road and back again. Your heart is true you're a pal and a confidant..."

On to my post...

I have always considered myself a strong person.. I still do, But what is it that helps Military wives stay strong in the long times of separation? Is it staying busy? Maybe it's allowing yourself to break down behind closed doors... or is it setting out to conquer to world that makes us "Strong"?

There are so many things that One can define as what makes them "strong". Again, I think it's all part of dealing with things in our own way, what's best for us that makes any one person "Strong". Crying is not negative (unless it's excessive, then I believe that keeps your mind in a negative state of being).

For me, I have found that while I am a STRONG, INDEPENDENT woman, I still need my support system.

Undergoing the separation from my husband due to the Navy lifestyle, I have found that being strong isn't what gets you ready for a Deployment, or even through the times your apart for any reason from your Significant other. What do I believe gets you through? Your Support System.

Personally, I sought after my husband's command Family Readiness Group for a solid support group of other ladies that understand any of the emotions that come with the military life- looking for understanding. However, I realized not all FRG's are the well organized groups I have read about in several military wife books, so I sought my own support. I didn't want to go at this alone. I wanted a support group of FRIENDS.

That's what I did. Friendships were formed and I now have the best support group that one could ever ask for. My support group, friends, continues to grow. We support each other.. we all have something to offer with our knowledge, compassion, humor, honesty, selflessness, and more.

In relationships that have long separations, I believe it is mostly the people you choose to surround yourself with that makes you "Strong". It is the Support group that holds you up and keeps you from falling.

As a great lady once commented to me, "There is strength in numbers".

Am I ready for this deployment? Yes and No.. In those times that "I'm not ready", or those moments when "This is hard".. I have an amazing support group of friends to lean on, as they do me. 

"....And if you through a party, Invited everyone you ever knew, You would see the biggest gift would be from me And the card attached would say thank you for being a friend."

Operation Underway: Completed; Next Mission: Deployment

My husband's ship has been undergoing many underways since the month of April preparing for deployment. Anywhere from 2 days to 45 days at a time, the underways have been continuous, every month, sometimes more than once a month to more than a month at a time.

I did not have any times where I broke down because of him being underway. Yeah sure, I missed him while he was away.. but I never let him being gone get the best of me. I faced challenges while he was gone, but those challenges would have been thrown at me in ordinary civilian life. Any times where I felt as if I was going to "Lose it" cannot be attributed to anything with the Navy.

Did I think it was hard? Eh, Yes and no. Missing him did sometimes make the underways tough... maybe not so much missing him- but the constant adjusting and readjusting on top of his port schedule. By the time I had adjusted to him being gone, I was waiting on the pier to bring him home- and vice versa. There were several times that I hadn't completely adjusted to him being gone and he'd come home. I wouldn't be adjusted to him being home and he'd leave again. It was a constant "gotta do this, get ready for this",  over and over and over. But now, We are at the end of the strenuous training schedule and now reality is setting in. Buckle up- It's time for Deployment.

I continually compare things I have went through in the Military family lifestyle with past military adventures. I have to say, A-school still gets the prize for being the most challenging. Bootcamp was tough- many tears and really learning to adjust and be on my own again... But A-school, I will take bootcamp and another million underways before I would choose to go through the challenges my husband and I went through as a married couple.

Bootcamp, PCSing without my husband, being away from family, constant underway schedule- I will gladly go through again and again, but you can keep the A-school ;).
(p.s. I wrote a post on A-school early in my blog)

I have been told that Deployment will be easier in many ways compared to the underway schedule. During a deployment- I will actually get to fully adjust to him being gone- which by the way, I'm actually excited about adjusting to a schedule! Although, I'd much rather adjust to a schedule with him home... I'm looking forward to being able to plan things again. I know I will probably worry about a bit more during deployment.. but I know that I will not keep me from living every day life. No use worrying constantly and making yourself miserable.

I have so much planned during deployment.. I'm actually excited for my husband to leave and come home to see all I accomplish while he's away. He says he's excited to leave and come home for me to see all the muscle he is going to put on from working out- we shall see about the muscle ;).. he's got to get away from those darn 3 Musketeers! He's not a big guy.. my husband is a little guy.. well, average I'd say now. Since April, he has gained 30 pounds. While every other guy on the USS Enterprise has lost tons of weight from the horrible food- not to mention food poisoning, my husband GAINED weight.. oh yes, $100 a month in 3 Musketeers will do that to you. I really don't have anything else to say about that, just a little laugh about it... It's definitely NOT normal haha.

I plan to write a post later this week on things I have learned in general and things I have learned about myself from these underway periods. Might just to that tomorrow. We shall see ;)

So now I say: Dear Deployment, Bring it On!

Ola Vevik, The Navy and How They Saved My Life

Today, I am proud to have Jennifer, aka Inside My Mind [like Phantom of the Opera] guest blogging for me. I have known Jennifer for quite some time. She's awesome. She is not a Military spouse, or a wife in general. She wears no service uniform or Medals above her heart. But one thing is for sure. This girl has a great head on her shoulders. This girl will go far in life. Jennifer is Passionate about the military, she has great appreciation for it.

Jennifer, If you choose the Navy life, I know that you will make an amazing Sailor. I thank you for your passion wanting to join something bigger than yourself. For staying positive, for always smiling. I can't say that I have ever met anyone more patriotic than you.

When I asked Jennifer to blog for my "Thankful" week. She was more than thrilled, I'd say just a wee bit excited ;)

I asked Jenny, "Why are you Thankful for the Navy?"

"Ola Vevik, The Navy and How They Saved My Life"

I thought long and hard about what I wanted to write for this blog. I LOVE the military and my country. I have no idea why, it's just the way it is. I'm that person that cries during the Star Spangled Banner and especially the Pledge of Allegiance. Ridiculous, I know but it's just the way it is.
I'm especially thankful for the Navy, it saved my life. And here's how:

So, it was 1980, my dad is a 28 year old alcoholic. His life was completely messed up and he wanted a way out. He thought joining the military would help get him cleaned up. He was wrong.
He first went to the Army Recruitment Office to enlist. They wouldn't let him though because he had a drug possession charge from 1971 that they considered a felony. So he waltzed down to the Navy Recruitment Office. They only considered his drug possession as a misdemeanor. So he enlisted.
He spent the next 3 years traveling the world, partying it up and getting paid for it. It came time for his 3 year tour to end. He told me that there had been rumors that the "Big E", as he affectionately refers to the Enterprise, was going to Australia. So of course he wanted to go. He'd always dreamed of going to Australia: pretty women, exotic accents and a fun time. Who wouldn't? So he signed up for another year.
Shortly after re-enlisting, he took a sledgehammer to the boatswain's locker and did A LOT of damage. His immediate superior, Ola Vevik, the ship's boatswain, went before the captain on my dad's behalf. He came back with 2 options. Option 1. be reduced to a seaman recruit. Option 2. Go to drug and alcohol rehab in San Diego for 13 weeks.
He chose rehab. He finished out his last year with the "Big E" and went back to Milwaukee where he met my mother.
I'll be eternally grateful to Mr. Vevik and the Navy. They could have just discharged him but instead they gave him a choice. If he hadn't gotten his life straightened out, I wouldn't be here. He wouldn't have gone back home, my mother would have never dated him and I wouldn't be here right now.
I'm so proud of my dad. I love him so much. And like I said, I'm so thankful for the Navy and Ola Vevik.
If anyone who is reading this happens to know of Mr. Vevik or a way I can get in touch with him, I'd love to thank him personally if at all possible.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

I am Thankful for this Life

Today is Thanksgiving day. What are you Thankful for?

The typical response is usually something along the lines of family, friends, turkey.. etc. All of which I'm very thankful for. However, today, I'm going to go a different route with what I'm thankful for.

I'm Thankful for this life.. The Military life that so many don't appreciate, but I owe so much to. We all do.

Today, as many stuff their mouth's full of Turkey, dressing and the works, I will keep in mind why I have the luxuries such as being able to enjoy such a nice meal.

I'm thankful for my freedom. Without the Military, that freedom could so easily be taken away. I'm thankful that I still have my rights because of the brave men and women who have so bravely decided to join something bigger than themselves and fight for those freedoms. Past, Present and Future.. I thank you.

I am Thankful that my husband does have a secure job, and steady income. The pay may not be the greatest, but the Pride we have for our Country, my husband's brothers & sisters in service, by far make up for the lack of pay.

I'm thankful for Deployments. Yes, I am THANKFUL. This goes back to the "Freedom" thing. Thank you!

I am Thankful for the amazing ladies I have met along my Journey as a "Navy Wife". For the sense of "Togetherness" and understanding. Thankful for having "Somebody to lean on".

I'm thankful for TriCare. Oh yes, one of the biggest complaints I hear. I am Thankful. Yea sure, the wait may suck sometimes, but you have the option to opt out of TriCare and get other means of insurance. I choose to have TriCare, and I appreciate no monthly premium. Can't complain about something given to you for free! We're not talking co-pays.. a lot of companies have co-pays.

I am thankful for the military, especially the Navy since that is the lifestyle I'm involved with. I am thankful because of the US Navy, I know how strong I am. I know how independent I am.

I am Thankful for Emails! Oh how I love them.

I am thankful for the communication skill the Military lifestyle has forced my husband and I to learn to keep our marriage strong.

I am thankful for the discounts we all get for being military and dependents. They may not be much, but I'm appreciative that my husband's service is recognized.

I could continue this post for ages. No amount of words could ever show how THANKFUL I am to the military, to this life my husband and I CHOSE for ourselves.

Today, I THANK you Military- I Thank You Navy, Army, Marines, Airforce and Coast Guard. THANK YOU for allowing me to continue my day to day life with the luxuries I have and so many others that are taken for Granted.


I am Thankful for this life.

I'm Thankful for this Deployment

Today, I am hosting Samantha from Navy Doll.

I love Sam! She is a beautiful person, inside and out. I love that she holds NOTHING back, she stands firm on her beliefs.. while at the same time, she doesn't disrespect anyone else's beliefs. She and I don't always agree on things, but we never trample one another's beliefs. I have had the privilege of meeting her in Person a couple times now. I guarantee you.. there is no reason in the world for you to not like this woman.

<- Look at her! Gorgeous!

Even though most of mine and Samantha's friendship has been an online acquaintance... I consider her a true friend. She's a great listener and I feel like I always have someone to count on.

I asked Samantha, "What are you Thankful for when it comes to the Military?". I hope you enjoy her post:

"I'm Thankful for this Deployment"

Here we are, another holiday coming around the corner and it is just myself and my two kids. Where is my husband? In the middle of the ocean, thousands of miles away. I should be cursing the military for making him miss Thanksgiving again. I should be crying to myself because I have a 7lb turkey in my freezer that I'm not cooking until Christmas. I should be jealous that everyone else gets to go home and be with their families. I'm not.  It's not the military's fault. It's his job and I'm not even slightly jealous or angry. I'm happy for others. I'm thankful that my friends and family are able to spend this holiday together. I'm thankful for this deployment.
Yes, I'm thankful for this deployment.  I realize the love that I have. The family that God has blessed me with. I have strength that I never thought I could have. Although this isn't our first deployment, this is our first one away from each other with two kids and no family close enough to run to. It is very different from the last.
This time spent apart has made me come to learn the things that I am sincerely most thankful for.
Reading an email from him, getting a phone call every so often, and having someone from his ship update their facebook gives me piece of mind. I look around at what I have and I see my beautiful babies. I have them with me. I am most thankful for that. Their smiles and laughter give me hope for better days. They are healthy, happy, and loved. So loved. Even when he is so far away, he loves them. What more could I ask for?
I'm thankful for my friends and family who care and make this deployment easy on the both of us. When I need a shoulder to cry on or an ear to vent to, I know who I can turn to. I'm so thankful for you all. Those of you who make me laugh everyday or just say kind words out of nowhere, thank you.
I'm thankful for my husband. He has been my best friend for 4 years and never has he let me down. Each day he is gone our love grows stronger. We know no distance or time. Sure we feel the strain of being apart some days. But isn't the homecoming the greatest moment to look forward to? All becomes better when I imagine us four hugging on that pier.
Lastly, I'm thankful that this isn't forever. As much as I love being a Navy wife, I know that I will have to let that go one day. Someday he will reenlist for the last time, he will bid his farewell to the job he loved so much, we will wake up one day, and our new life as a retired couple will begin. Our children will be off to college (or the military themselves), our travel plans will begin, our romance will be rekindled, and we will laugh about all the problems we had when we were younger.
The future. That's what I'm most thankful for.

Written with love by,
Samantha McDonald aka Navy Doll

NCIS on the Real

Today started as any other normal day. Woke up at 2 am with the husband, he jumped in the shower, I laid out his work clothes for him, he got ready and off to work he went.

I started on some custom graphics orders I had, and received the text that he made it to base. About 15 minutes later, he calls. He never calls in the morning. I knew something was wrong. I answer to hear, "Call the bank and cancel my card. I just got robbed.".

Honestly, at first.. I almost thought he was joking. Who gets robbed on base? Bases are secured, they are safe. I guess I was a bit delusional. He wouldn't joke about this.. not at 0315 in the morning! Without freaking out and asking questions, we got off the phone and I called to cancel his card, and he was filling NCIS in with the details of what happened. The gunmen made it to the ATM before I could get his card canceled. Drained several hundred dollars from our account. Thankfully, the bank is going to work with us to put that money back.

I called my husband back to ask what happened. Then reality set in. Today, I could have lost my husband.

My husband had just parked his car in the large parking lot across from the ship. He had just got out of his car and 2 masked men approached him with a shotgun. They forced him to the ground and held the gun to his back, demanding him to give them all his money. My husband never carries cash, all he had was his bank card. They took his wallet and demanded for the PIN number. My husband in a panic just gave them the PIN. They left and my husband called base police, and then me.

He filed a report with base police, then was questioned and filed a report with NCIS. Over an hour of questioning, and filing reports. At the same time, base police was searching the base. So far, no luck.

NCIS had me call the bank for information and timestamps on the ATM withdrawls since it would be faster than having to get a warrant or whatever and going straight to the bank. Right after I had called the bank and canceled his card, the bank system went down for maintenance. Meaning, not even the employees can acess any information. So, we have to wait to 8am before that information can be gathered by us.

NCIS told my husband that it was actually good that he gave the men the correct PIN (minus the stolen money). They said because of that, they can get time and place. They can then watch the gate tapes for the timeline. They can also get video from the ATM. Finger's crossed they get a lead. 

We are meeting with NCIS in the morning. Finger's crossed that the idiots are caught so that this won't happen to anyone else. It is definitely scary, especially knowing it happened on a "secured" base.

Right now, I don't care about the money that was stolen or anything other than the fact that  my husband is alive. Things could have been so much worse. Thank God my husband wasn't hurt. Nothing matters more to me than the fact that he is still here in this crazy world with me.

This gets Personal

What is PERSEC? It is the little thing (not so little) related to OPSEC that noone really pays any attention to. Honestly, it's not something JUST military families need to focus on. [Per]sonal [Sec]urity is something that everyone should watch out for. You never quite know who's checking up on you.. or looking for a time when you're vulnerable to any sort of adversity.

PERSEC is merely protecting your arse, protecting your "Personal" information.

With Today's technology.. Nearly everyone in the world breaks PERSEC in some way. Facebook, I notice is the EASIEST way to target someone. You know your profile is never TRULY private right? ;)

There are not set rules for PERSEC.. It's common sense if you think about it. But who really wants to think about things that deep into detail? Honestly, I break PERSEC.. Every person I know, personally and in the virtual world has broke PERSEC. I have fun with talking about PERSEC.. I always tend to scare some people with what they didn't realize they were sharing with the world. Because of my knowledge of PERSEC, I was told by a lady who works with Missing children services that she could easily get me a job with them because of my knowledge of PERSEC and my ability to point out things.

Enough with that.. now it's time to get you thinking.. Hopefully anyway. ;)

I'm going to use Facebook as my example for PERSEC.

• What is one thing that most everyone breaks on Facebook? Using your name. Not only do a lot of people Post their first and last names.. I see a lot of Middle names and Maiden names. 
• You have a profile picture. Now I know what you look like... and I still know your full name ;)
• I know who you're friends with.
• You post your hometown, and your current city.. I know where you're from and a general Idea of where you're at.
• You update your status to tell me where you are going.. where you've been, what you're doing, what you're going to do. I know when you're home. Now all I need is to figure out where you live to rob your house, or go to the place you're going to find you and follow you home. 
• You post your phone number.
• You talk about your job in your status, you tell information about your job in your info/job section. I now know who you work for, and it's not hard to figure out where when you've already given me so many other details.

*Keep in mind, Facebook is not as private as you think it is. And when you accepted the terms of service, you gave Facebook permission to sell and use in anyway any bit of information on your page.. this includes your pictures.  (I'll get to pictures here in a minute)

• I can see the pages you like. I'm going to use a Navy wife as an example. Your husband is on a ship, you "Like" the ship's official facebook page. I now know that your husband is in the Navy.. oh yes, a military family. Perfect. You'd be surprised how many people in the US.. American born citizens that wouldn't mind collecting information on you and selling it to the "Enemy". Anyway, back on track- From you liking the ships page, I can find out where the ships home port is. Again, I have your general location. I know if your husband is home, underway or deployed. I know if you're alone (without your husband). From your FB, I know your name, what you look like, general location, your likes, your status updates, what ship you're affiliated with, what branch of military.. etc. You get the idea.

You want to know another extremely easy way to figure out something about a person, (other than by status updates posted by someone who posts everything they do and when they are doing it)? Your pictures. "How can you figure out things from pictures?" you may ask... Just listen  read on, I'll tell you ;)

For someone who is non military, or for military some of these apply to both.

• How many people do you know post mobile uploads? You're at a concert.. you post pictures while you're at the show. I now know where you're at and that you're not home.
• You get a new car, you post a picture of it. I know what you're driving now. Not to mention you just posted a status about your new car.
• You get a new house, or a new place to rent. You take a picture of it. Most people fail to remember that their street address number is on their house... Now, I know you live in XYZ city and your address number is 123. We're narrowing it down now ;) Plus I know exactly what you look like, what your car is and looks like, what your house looks like.. hmm.. Common mistake with renters- posting pictures of the surrounding areas and amenities. Posting pics of the inside of your place. No big deal right? Not until someone comments and is interested in renting near you and you tell them the complex name.
• You're new car was in the picture of your house.. Did you realize that your license plate is showing? Or in the picture you took of your new car.. Ding ding ding! I now can get your complete address if you're vehicle is registered in the state you're in. Either way.. I have an address that I can use to get to you.. whether by you directly or to your family back home ;)

I can keep going with that.. but you get the idea I hope. It's fairly easy smeazy. 

This is for military families- Photos and military PERSEC. This scared a friend of mine.

• You or your SO posts pics from port.. while you're at port. I know your direct location. There's only so many ports, All you have to do is figure out the country.
• You or your SO post a picture in Uniform. I'm going to use the the Navy dress uniform as an example. On your dress uniform, some wear a name tag, I now have your last name and I know what you look like. There's more. From that dress uniform, I know your command. I will then be able to find out if the family is alone and the sailor is deployed. I will know a general area for the family. From the uniform, I also know your rate and your rank. I know you're accomplishments from your ribbons and medals.
• You post a picture of the person in Uniform armed up, gun in hand. I can use this to make the US and the Military look bad... not to mention the things I can do with photoshop using your picture. 

I can go on and on. All of this applies to all social networking and forums... anything that's put out there in cyber space.

Here is a simple, commonly done PERSEC violation: (pulled from MIL Spouse online)
Unsafe way to post:
Posted by:  CrystalLovesGreg:  “Hey girls, sorry I won’t be in the forums today.  My son, Mike (he’s six) is home with the flu.   We just got back from Portsmouth Naval Hospital where we waited for six hours at the ER.  My two girls were crazy!  Anyway, I hope he gets better in time for DH’s return next week.  We go back for a follow up Tuesday morning.  I’ll be back on tomorrow.

What a lurker has probably learned:  You’re a Navy wife, named Crystal, with three children: two girls, one boy, age six, named Michael.  You live in Hampton Roads and your husband, named Greg, is on a ship returning in less than seven days.  And, if I wanted to find you, I could simply hang out Tuesday at the Portsmouth Naval Hospital and wait for a woman with three children who fit this description.  Voila! 

Safe way to post:  “Hey girls, sorry I won’t be posting today.  I’m taking care of my children.  Talk to you tomorrow.”



How much information are you giving out?

Come join me and "Fart Rainbows"

Over the past couple days, I have learned something about myself. Okay, Well, I have learned what a few other negative individuals -Think- about myself. As I shared with a friend.. It makes me giggle.

Here's what I now know about myself:

• Because I blog positively about the Navy and the military lifestyle, I am fake and am not blogging about how I truly feel about it. *giggles*
• Because I haven't went through a deployment, I need to keep my mouth shut because I don't know what to expect. *giggles*
• Deployment will change my positivity. 
• I have only been a Navy wife for two years, I don't know anything about the military lifestyle. *Ha!
• I haven't been through anything tough due to being in the military lifestyle. *t'hahaha
• Because I'm Positive, and enjoy this lifestyle I go around telling people to "Suck it up". *hmmm
• Evidently I'm "Too Proud" of my husband and the Military.
• Because I carry the attitude that You signed up for this, and that You didn't have to stick with your SO if you carry so much hatred in your words toward the military.. that this grants the thought that I should be punched in the face
• That evidently I think having emotions and missing your SO is wrong and being negative.
• Thinking that "Any time is better than No time" is a bad view point- *I think this is where the "Suck it up" was pulled from.
• I'm going to need Xanax because of my faulty optimism. 
• I "Sh*t Glitter and Fart Rainbows"

I could keep going here. Oh the hilarity.

I blog positively. Why? Because that is who I am. I'm a positive person. I don't like negativity. AND I don't see anything negative about being a Navy wife.. or just being a military Family. I Like.. LOVE this lifestyle. My husband and I chose this for US. We chose it... as in Me and him sat down and made the decision TOGETHER. Even if he made the decision before me... I would have chose to stick through it all.. making the military life MY decision. Since when did being an honest person make someone fake?

What is there to know about a deployment? What is the difference from these workups that my husband has been on for months for more than a month at a time? NOTHING BUT TIME. Yeah, sure the risks are there with his safety and I may worry a little more than with just an underway. We won't talk any less than we do on these underways. So don't tell me to shut my mouth when I already have a pretty good idea of What to expect. Bring it on Deployment! I'm not scared of you! ;)

Deployment will not change who I am. I am me.. The military doesn't have an affect on that.. You don't have an affect on the person that I am. So, Mrs. "Deployment is the Devil".. Try me. Again, Not scared of Deployment. :D

Just because a wife has only been "Married to the Military" for less than a "Veteran" wife.. doesn't mean she's any less knowledgeable. That's been put out there so clearly to me. Kind of like saying just because you're older means you're more mature. hmm.. I've educated myself on anything and everything I can read about the military. Yes the Physical emotions the separation of deployment brings.. I have yet to feel.. But I know what to expect. I've learned plenty in my two years as a wife, and also growing up surrounded by a military family. And yes, I have done a PCS on my own.. I have had my car break down while my husband is away.. I've had more than 3 miscarriages without my husband here to comfort me. I could go on.. I never said it was easy, You just won't see me saying anything Negative about the Navy. The Navy did nothing to me... even with extended underways, schedule changes, seeing my husband for just 1 hour a day.. I'm not complaining. I'm thankful for that 1 hour! I have no control, neither does my husband. It's his job.. WE made this lifestyle for us. :)

I don't tell anyone to "Suck It Up". I simply say Handle it... Not just military related. ANY situation.. Handle it. It's HOW you handle it that makes you either a positive person or a Debbie Downer/ Complainer/ extremely negative person. There is a positive in EVERY situation. All depends on how you view it. I choose to be positive. 18 months without my husband.. I sure as heck will be grateful for 3 days over no time at all. Would WISH there was more time, but wouldn't complain that the [Branch of service] screwed us over.

Is is possible to be too proud of your Significant other? I mean really.. My husband LOVES that I support him with every breath of my body. My husband is Glad that I am such a positive person and know that I make my own happiness. He is proud that when he's away for 40 days to 9 months to 13 months that I am still smiling.. happy, and being his support. My husband would be highly upset if I was too down his job in any way.

Do you think Positivity grants the thought that someone would want to punch me in the face? It makes me laugh. Which cheek do you want? ;)

I sure as hell hope that every single person misses their significant other while they are away. Being in a constant positive state of being does NOT mean that you don't miss your SO... or that this lifestyle doesn't have it's challenges. Life is about challenges.. Military or NOT. It's about how you handle them.. (I feel like I'm on repeat here.). Missing someone.. showing your emotions doesn't necessarily mean you're being negative... Even when you're angry.. You can still be positive and act mature about it.

Obviously I'm not the one in need of the Xanax.. I think the person with so much hate and negativity could use it. I think it could help mellow you out. ;) So, continue to be jealous that I have a positive stand point on life.

I love the fact that someone thinks that I must poop glitter and fart rainbows. Seriously, I do love that.. it wasn't sarcasm. It was meant in a derogatory manor.. But ya know what. I know a bunch of ladies, a bunch of my readers who stand right there with me.. all of us "Farting Rainbows".. It's quiet pretty. Maybe you should join us. It takes a lot of talent to be this darn awesome. ;D

Sincerely,
The Navy Wife Blogger that has the Attitude of June Cleaver.

Operation: Get Prepared

I have been neglecting my blog for the past couple of weeks. My husband has been on leave and I have been soaking up every minute of time I have with him.  He goes back to work tomorrow. Today we are just lounging and relaxing... and recuperating. Seems he and I both caught some kind of little sick bug going around.

As I sit here, I'm thinking about Deployment. I realize we have only 1 or 2 more short underways before the big "D". And so much is going to happen in the short time we have before then.

Does it scare me? Yes and No. I'm not scared of what will happen to us. I know that our relationship will only be strengthened by Deployment. I'm not scared of the time apart. Yes, I know I'm going to have bad days, but I'm going to have good days too. I know I'm strong enough as an individual to bring my own happiness and make the best of every day that comes. The part that scares me is the things that can happen on deployment. The risks he will face... the same risk every service member faces. But it's part of it.. this is his job- the job he and I both signed up for when he joined. Time to put on those "Big Girl Panties".

Before deployment comes, like I said earlier, there  is so much that will be happening.. and things that have to get done so I can say that I'm prepared to be on my own for a bit without the help of my husband.

We are moving.. yet again. But this next place we will be staying for the next 4 years. The place is absolutely perfect... and We can have Riley and actually say she is a Pit bull. We lucked up with a friend of his getting orders to Florida and the guy owns a house... Townhouse, 3 bedrooms, 2 1/2 bathrooms Living Room, Den, cute kitchen, dinning room, washer & dryer, BACK YARD! :), huge bathtub.. and an attic- OH, and a garage that we are converting to a studio for my photography! Heck yes. I can't wait to move. We are using deployment orders to break our lease to get out of this place we're in now.. I love the size of our place now, but we're having more and more trouble with this place and we don't feel safe with me being here alone during Deployment. The neighborhood we will be moving to is nice, quite and SAFE! We will have neighborhood watch. Awesome. But now.. the boxes that I seemed to just have unpacked, need to be packed again. We will be moving at the end of November toward the beginning of December. I cannot wait. I'm seriously IN LOVE with this place. Not to mention it's location. I actually saw barns in the area.. In the little over a year we have been in Hampton Roads, I have not seen a single barn until the other day. I seriously got "kid like" excited. For a split second.. I was reminded of our hometown in TN. Anyway.. enough about the new place.

There is a lot to do to get prepared for the big D... Some of which we have already done.

• Power of Attorney- Check, We have 2 different types- I'm more than covered in this area. 
• A will- Not real sure how much we need this.. we don't own much and everything we do is in both our names.. other than his car, and we don't have kids. But might be best to get it anyway.
• Review life insurance Policies, gosh I hate thinking about this.. but it's part of being adult, not just military.
• Get switched to TriCare Prime- I should have already done this forever ago.
• Set up a second savings account for the 1973 Dodge Dart my husband wants to fix up.
• Have the Car serviced, and any problems that need to be fixed.. fixed.
• Sell my 2000 Cavalier- Less than 60K miles if you want it! ;)

I think that's it as far as the physical preparedness.. But Considering this Deployment will be my first.. I could be missing some "Must Do's".

As far as emotionally, and things to accomplish... I have several.. Here are some:

• Have 3 friends (obviously I have more, but to me.. these are the musts)- 1 person that will tell you to "Get over it", "Put your big girl panties on".. Believe it or not- I think everyone needs this person to keep you thinking straight. 1 person to be your shoulder to cry on, the person you vent to.. your "Therapist" in my opinion. We all need someone to listen that doesn't judge you. and 1 person that is a wife from your husband's command, that is going through the same exact things your are for the same amount of time... because I believe that at some point you feel as if others not associated with your husband's deployment don't understand.. even if in all actuality.. everyone who is going through or has gone through a deployment definitely understands.
• Write a list of goals to accomplish.. So far I have things like- Decorate our *new* place, Do training classes with Roo (our Pitty), Get on a set workout routine, make a list of carepackage ideas.. etc
• Blog more about how the "PreDeployment" is affecting me.. or how it's not affecting me because I created this blog for things related to military life- and what I think.. and to hopefully give insite from my view of how things happen. 
• Read more- because I realize how much I love learning new things. 

I have so much planned and what not.. just kind of drawing a blank right now.. might have something to do with the dayquil.. feeling a little "Medicine head".

The Navy has it SO EASY!

Title catch your attention? I know there are Navy wives and girlfriends that have read that and said, "Oh no she didnt!". But it was for that reason I titled it that.. to catch your attention. I don't agree with it... it's actually something I have read a few people post that totally irks me.

I hear so many people who say this.. that have no experience with the Navy lifestyle What so ever! People who turn it into a branch battle.. Which shouldn't happen, They fight for the SAME things. For you, for me, For everyone, this country, for FREEDOM.

Let me just give you a taste of what the Navy lifestyle throws our way, just because It seems that so many have a skewed view on it.


Our men go on Deployment!
This is where I hear, "Well at least it's not a year!"... or, "Well the Navy only goes out for 4-6 months, unlike [insert other branch here], so he'll be home in no time.". Wrong! Yeah sure, some of the deployments are 4-6 months.. BUT not always. PLUS there is more to the Navy than ships than so many seem to believe.. c'mon people. With Carriers, if they are not going out to temporarily fill in for another ship, they are out for a MINIMUM of 6 months, which in every case I have seen, has turned into more! AND they do what's called "World Cruises". It may sound like a vacation, but it's not. World cruises are 9-11 months and and I have read of several ships that went out 13  months during a world cruise. They don't just sit out there in a "Tin Can" and "Party it up" like some have it in their heads. Some seem to believe it's all fun and games and they don't carry a gun.. blah blah blah. If this was the case.. my husband wouldn't have joined the Navy. Plus, knowing my husband's Rate and also his TDY  status doing 2 jobs.. I know how dangerous it can be for my husband on a day to day basis, out to sea and in port. It's not at all how some see it.

Also, Ships don't get R&R with their families. They go out and are gone til the Deployment is done.

Pirate Ships are REAL!
As comical and a myth as it may seem.. They are still around. They shoot at the Navy ships, Attack ships, They've been known to hijack vacation cruise ships, etc. Every Carrier I have known to go out on deployment since I have been a Navy wife (2 years now) has encountered pirate ship(s).


There is more than Just Ships to the Navy!
I know 2 guys with the Navy who are currently in Afghanistan fighting right this very moment. One is on a shorter deployment, but he's working with the Seals, which is one of the hardest things in the Navy. The other guy I know I know over there is a friend of mine and my husband's. He is from my husband's ship and is working alongside the Army for just as long as the Soldiers who he is fighting with, a year. And when he comes home.. He'll shortly after meet up with his ship for yet another deployment. I know another guy who is about to leave to fight alongside the Army.

Also, the Navy Corpsmen , are over there with the Marines. Just because they are over there for medical, doesn't mean they don't face the heat of gunfire. They are out in the field as well, getting shot at, fighting alongside the marines.

I could continue with "Deployments", but I hope I already made my point. Let me Continue with another part of "Navy Life".

 Continuous Training.. Also known as "Workups"
Ok, Let me tell you how things work with the Navy ships.. We have what's called "Workups". Where they go out for weeks to more than a month out to sea at a time, come home for a few days, sometimes we're lucky enough to get a week or two, but they go back out. This lasts for Months to a Year before the actual deployment. It's constant in and out.. Constant adjusting to them being gone. You finally get a grip on them being gone, and they come home and you have to readjust to them being home and sometimes before you can completely adjust, they are out and in again... making it a never-ending cycle of adjusting and readjusting. It can become stressful for a wife, for the Sailor.. and even more so on the child of the service member- the Navy Junior, or Navy Brat as some call them.

My husband has been gone nearly 85% of the time or MORE since April with these workups. Thankfully, I work well under stress, but Yes, I admit.. there are times where it gets to be a lot to handle and a near break down can occur. I haven't broke down yet, and I'm going to try my hardest to stay as strong as I have for this.  But this is just the beginning of this journey. I have only spent maybe 10-15 days with my husband since April- if that, because of his job.

The point of this isn't to argue "Navy Life".. the point of this blog is to hopefully open the minds of the people who are closed minded and try to one up other branches. It's the same for all of us. We all go through the same things. Our Husbands, the service members are all fighting battles of this war. They are ALL FIGHTING. They work together... whether you want to see it or not, they are all employed by the DOD, they have the same purpose... and more people need to see that.