Here's what I have learned tonight.
It's smart to go into a marriage with a Back-Up plan.
I have also learned that if you go into your marriage with No back-plan you are uneducated, dependent on your husband, are "dumb", oblivious to the "Real World".. etc. [insert another uneducated judgmental comment here]
*Takes chill pill*
When I said, "Yes, [husband], I will marry you!". I wasn't thinking, "Oh shit, I need a back up because we may get divorced down the road". That, to me, is like keeping divorce papers in my top dresser drawer just in case I change my mind. Horse shit is what that is. Excuse me if you disagree, it's one of those blogs- my beliefs.
When the husband and I got engaged, My thought process was eternity, DEATH do us part. The dreaded "D", and by "D" I mean Divorce (although Death isn't something I like to speak of either!), was not a possibility. It is STILL not in my thought process nor is it something he and I toss around for shits and giggles.
Divorce isn't an option. We don't believe in it. Does that mean things don't happen? No. However, WE went into our marriage believing in our relationship 100%, no doubts. We do not believe in divorce. So, thinking I needed to have a "Back-up plan" before saying, "I do" is just silly to me.
Ok, because I didn't set this back up plan, I'm a.)dumb; Considering how far I've come over the years, the things I've accomplished and the things I have overcome- I know I'm far from "dumb". b.)oblivious; I'm well aware. And I know my relationship and I know I don't need a "Back-up plan" to ensure I'm taken care of in ANY situation. c.) Dependent; That made me chuckle. A dependent gal who who runs 2 businesses as well as has a part time job, plus volunteers with various organizations. I believe I can handle my own.
Need I say more?
I'm far from a dumbass. I'm actually quite successful according to my personal definition of "Success". I would much rather focus on my relationship and staying positive within my marriage rather than focus on the Negative and the thought process of making plans for divorce.
I didn't enter my marriage thinking, "There's always divorce". I didn't get married expecting a divorce. I went into my marriage- and to this day, have 100% faith in my marriage. Through the good times and the bad, my Back-up plan IS MY MARRIAGE- my husband.
"Smart" it may be to have this so called, "Back-up plan" for some, I don't need a "Back-up Plan". My "Plan" is to focus on my Marriage and not on myself, not on the what if's, and surely not on divorce.