Four years ago this week, I was panicking, stressing and extremely nervous. On top of that, I was extremely excited. Four years ago, I was only days away from marrying the most perfect man.
Fast forward to four years later, today, and I'm feeling those same emotions- but not for a wedding, and I'm not stressing over my anniversary, but I am stressing about homecoming. It creeps up on you and you wonder where all the time has went and how come your to-do list isn't done yet. Thoughts like, "Has he changed?", "Will he look at me different?", "Will he love me the same?", "I just want everything to be perfect" and more sometimes go through your head.
The most stressful parts to a deployment, to me, are the time leading up to him actually leaving, the final countdown to homecoming and then about a month after they've been home. There's a lot of adjusting, preparing, worrying, stressing, excitement, etc. Did I mention adjusting?
That's one thing about this lifestyle you either learn to love, or you learn to hate- in my opinion. Luckily, I thrive under pressure, even if I don't always like it. I get things done and get them done damn near perfect. It's the perfectionist in me. I want everything perfect. But let's face it, nothing is perfect. But, you make them perfect in their own little way.
Like my husband says, "Everything will be perfect, just being home with you is perfect.".
This is the time I have to remind myself to breathe, to relax while at the same time.. I'm telling myself to hustle, get busy and get things done. I fight with myself a lot on that.
This week, I have a lot to do. But, I'm going to make sure I take time this Thursday, September 27th and stop and do nothing but have fun. September 27th marks my 4 year anniversary to my perfect husband. He's not perfect, neither am I, but he is the perfect one for me.