Military Wives are Vultures

In the nearly 4 years my husband has been active duty, one thing that is so apparent is some military wives are viscous creatures.

I don't want to even acknowledge them as human beings, because in my eyes, there are many who are scum. Scum in so many different forms.

I have found, at least here at his first duty station, it is hard to find people who are genuine, true friends and true to their significant others. On top of that, there are some extremely nosy scum out there and love to get mess twisted to start rumors.

Here are the different vultures I am referring to:

a. You have the tag chasers. And by tag chasers, I mean the girl who just bounces around from service member to service member. The girl who doesn't care if the service member is in a relationship.. it just ups her game. The girl who doesn't even love her significant other, but is rather obsessed with the lifestyle and the "glory" she perceives this life to be.

b. You have those who are so fixated with the lifestyle. I understand there is "excitement", but then there is overboard. When my husband joined, I was overly proud. I'm overly patriotic and always have been. But at some point, you have to recognize the military is his job. Yes, this is a lifestyle to adjust to, but this is HIS job. By fixated, I'm making reference to those who feel as if they, themselves, are "Military". I understand when people refer to non-military families as "civilians", I understand it because it's the easiest way to refer to it. But we do need to realize as wives, we are not active duty.. or even in the reserves, no special rank.. no rank whatsoever- we are a civilian. Relish in the fact that you, unless you enlisted, are not government property.

c. You have bullies. It's sad to say, but I know 8 year olds who are more mature than a lot of the ladies I have met in the past 4 years. I don't understand why so many spouses to active duty military feel the need to belittle and bully other spouses. "Oh you're fat, You're ugly, Can you believe she wore that to the commissary, someone's been eating too many twinkies".. etc. I've read some extremely ridiculous posts belittling people on Facbook as well as in the blog world, It's disgusting.

d. Those who think we are owed something for our SO being active duty. You aren't owed anything. YES, this life has challenges- but so do non-military families aka "civilian families". Every single person in this world has their own set of challenges to face. I for one, am grateful for the ease of life I have now compared to what I had before my husband joined the Navy. By ease, I don't mean there aren't challenges, but I'm happy where I'm at and I'll gladly wait for him through a deployment vs. go back to eating peanut butter sandwhiches every day, 3 times a day to pay rent. And to clear things up, I married my husband before he joined- just to stop the vultures that say, "You married him for the military/ money".

e. The cheaters. Yes, I know there are men in the military who cheat- that is a different tangent. I'm talking about those who are "SO in love" with their husband, but after 5 months of a deployment, find themselves in bed with another man. Seriously, cheating is NEVER an accident. YOU can prevent yourself being put in a situation that could lead to cheating. My husband has been deployed a few months, and the fact that I have heard of several gals cheating is insane. WHY did you get married? I mean, if you truly LOVE someone, you wouldn't cheat. Staying faithful shouldn't be hard.

I could keep going, but I'm going to leave it at that. Find your own identity, not your significant other's job status.

Expressing Yourself -vs- OPSEC

Today, I was directed to a blog post that urked one of my friends to see how I felt about it. Well, the more I sit here and think about it.. the more I let it bother me. Hence the blog.

First off, let me just say that OPSEC is something I follow all the time, as ANYONE associated to a service member should.

After reading the blog post Ah, OPSEC posted on Semper Spouse by "Alpha Wife", I was absolutely disgusted. I posted the link her blog post on Facebook as well. Seems so many agree with me, as they should.. on this subject anyway.

If you didn't click the Links above to read her post, let me just break it down some:

"if I find myself needing to share some of them in order to get something off my chest, I will." [referring to sharing deployment details]

She finds it alright to put her husband and his unit at risk for her to "Get something off her chest". If my husband was in her husband's command.. I would be livid. Hell, this upsets me and he's not connected to my husband!

"So there's a big middle finger to OPSEC, I suppose. They can't silence me and expect me to let everything build up inside me just because they are a bunch of paranoids have set guidelines that they think every spouse should adhere to." 

 Paranoids? Try concerned for the safety of our men and women who are fighting over there this very moment, and any person wearing a uniform serving in the United States Military. They have set these guidelines for a reason. And by YOU being in a relationship with a service member it is YOUR responsibility to adhere to them.


"I have a blog so that I can spill things the way I see it. And if one sneaky terrorists came to MY blog and decided to do any no-good deed to whoever because of details that I shared, then whatever, I'll take responsibility."

By this.. She is saying that she will take responsibility.. Is she saying that she will gladly take responsibility of a wounded service member, or even worse a fallen service member?! Is she the one who will tell a child that her father was killed because she couldn't keep her mouth shut and didn't care that she put so many at risk just so she could express herself? Yes, I'm on a rant. I'm livid.

Is it just me, or is the linked post a very selfish and disgusting post? We would all love to go on and on about when our loved one is coming home, or rant about how we don't want them to leave on "such and such" date. BUT is it really worth it to put your husband in harms way? NO IT'S NOT and if you think it is.. YOU ARE ONE SICK AND TWISTED PERSON!

You can express yourself without posting any information putting the Military at risk. I know this.. I have been doing it for a while now with My brother being in the service and now my husband. Not just me, but the family members of service members I'm friends with in person and Facebook as well.. It doesn't just stop there.. look at all the military significant others who post blogs.. They express themselves and THEY KEEP THEIR LOVED ONES SAFE BY NOT POSTING SENSITIVE INFORMATION!

Seriously, Some people do not need to be allowed to be associated with ANYTHING dealing with the Military. I pray to God that her husband doesn't know she poss the foolish mess that she has been.

Complaint Department, Take a Number

Yesterday I got Really irritated. Okay, honestly I was beyond irritated. I was on the verge of being irate! Ha, just realized.. I have 2 blogs (this being the 2nd) where I am CLEARLY on a rant.. and they both deal with Facebook. Why am I on that site again?

Ok, so it wasn't Facebook directly, but it petty girls on Facebook. I just read Mrs. Gambizzle's Post and this blog is related to hers. We're on the same rant.. and about the same person. Well, actually mine's more than just that person, but that person triggered my reaction. Am I rambling? pssh.

My husband's ship recently left for another workup. This one is one of the long stretches. I decide to get on Facebook yesterday morning, ya know.. to kinda put me in a good mood and talk to some of my military wife friends. Just wanted some casual conversation and maybe make some plans. What do I see as soon as I get on there? A girl posting "I don't need to see people whining and bitching about their guys being gone" She kinda rambled on and mentioned that she had her own problems that "are NOT military related". She has also posted that people need to "Suck it up and get over it. You signed up for this". She's always such a negative person and always Complaining about people "Complaining". Another girl posted something like "So what, your husband's gone.. get over it.".. *raises eyebrow, gritting teeth*

Ok, I agree with the whole "you signed up for this, suck it up" thing. BUT in a totally different sense than she did. I DID sign up for this life when I married my husband. I "Suck it up" when I have a day that the Navy changes plans or something goes wrong, and I don't COMPLAIN. That's how I look at it. But, I IN NO WAY signed up to NOT miss him. No one did.

I kinda lashed out. I have yet to post that I miss my husband, but that doesn't mean I don't miss him, because I do.. Very much so. I think it's normal to miss your husband.. and honestly, If you don't... Something is very wrong with you or your relationship. Just my thoughts. Anyway, back to the point.. I lashed out. I posted:

"gets annoyed when girls "Complain" about other's who post and complain about their men being gone. Do you realize you are "Complaining" more? Seriously. Shut up. Atleast some of us miss our boys."

I went on to say "I do not think posting that missing your SO while he is gone is complaining. I would HOPE that everyone will miss their significant other while they are away.
*OPSEC violations are a different story*Besides that.. Why not be positive? Negative status updates can effect others mood. Be encouraging and be there for the person who is having a hard time with their loved one gone. Some people actually like having their husband around."

That status update ended up being a bit of a popular post. Several girls thought the same thing I did, but didn't say it. Some of them needed to hear, "It's ok, you're allowed to miss him".. encouragement. It's good for everyone. I like being a positive person. I actually pride myself in knowing I try not to bring negativity in my life (although, sometimes.. it happens.).

The girl who triggered my post ended up deleting her status. I assume that maybe I wasn't the only one who said something. I considered deleting her, but I would like to be able to get along with all "Big E" wives, although.. is that really possible? The reason I want to get along with all possible is because there will be a couple positions on the FRG board opening soon. The president of the FRG said I would be a great person to be on it. The FRG leader's are by vote. So, I need want to get along with everyone.

 So there.. That is my Rant. Weewh... I feel better. ha. 

Do you agree? Or did I over react?